7 solutions for your new year’s resolutions

Sea of Cortez

2016 is a reality. Happy New Year!

For those of us who plan to stay in this world, it is a nice idea to have some new resolutions. You know some map for the road. Everything that helps us to be a better person is a great idea for a new year’s resolution.

I use some tricks to keep my self on track after the excitement is gone and the challenge arrives. I will call them principals and will share them under the magical number of seven, just to add some spice here.

Ok, here are my seven principals for self-motivation. I took them from other books, friends or simply, life experience.

  1. Realistic and measurable goals are easier to track. If I say I want to save 100 dollars, is something I can measure, it sounds simple and is not scary. Very different if I set the goal of saving. If I want to show love to my mom, I can break down the goal in counting how many times I am going to call with patience and care, go to a movie with her or bring her flowers. Did you go it? Not that life is only numbers, but having in the list something I can compare in December 2012 with what is me now will help. Ok, then take paper and pencil and put down your goals so clearly that a kindergartener can measure it.
  2. Changing others is not a goal. I hear very often in therapy people who want to change others because they are the problem. Well, the good news is that often they are not a problem. The bad news is that we are the ones who allow or not allow some behaviors toward us. If a goal is about a partner, a boss, or a cat, chances are you will face frustration and despair. I know, it is hard to think what we can need to relate different with others but is the best option, especially for a new year’s resolution.
  3. Baby and firm steps are the foundation of big accomplishments. Again, saving 100 dollars is a small goal, it seems possible and it is motivating. Saving 20,000 for a new car is also possible but harder to imagine. If you think that your 100 dollars represent now one of the tires of your new car, you will be motivated to save 300 more. Usually cars require 4 tires and a lot of things in between. Got it? Remember, self-discipline is shy, do not scare it with huge goals. Self-confidence, on the contrary grows up in the midst of little and evident successes.
  4. Public declaration is a commitment. By voicing your goals you are telling the universe: “ I am ready”. By sharing your goals with others you may inspire them to do their own. If they see that you are actually following thru, most likely they will get involved in your efforts. People love to help others who are working hard toward something wonderful.
  5. Have images to refresh your mind. I talked before about vision boards. Having a collage near my bed, help me to see them every morning and my brain has a clear map to follow. Any kind of image that helps you to see the outcome will be great.
  6. Self-compassion takes 5 seconds. If you broke your discipline, be kind and compassionate. Esther and Jerry Hicks would say, “be like a gps”. The voice in the gps is neutral. When you turn to the incorrect side, it says “recalculating route”, it never says, “your are stupid, now I need to think again”. Is it that clear? Love your self; shake your body ad start over. After all the year has 365 days. If you try this many times, you for sure will get to your goal.
  7. They must bring you joy. If your goal is a torture for your self, you better think if you really want it. We are made for wonderful things and learning how to enjoy the ride is as much important as arriving to our final destination. Besides, we are a more desirable company when we are willing to be happy.

I hope this is helpful. If you need any assistance, ask to those who already mastered whatever you want to accomplish. You may be surprised how many people love to share their experiences. Also, feel free to post here your goals or send an email. I will be glad to pray for you so may become a better person this 2016. It will be fun to see them again at the end of the year. Let’s the year begin that we are ready!

 

With love,

Carmen.

Comments here or at comment@morningswithcarmen.com


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