Is loneliness one of your guests this holiday season?

Last night I had a small christmas party with my “brothers” Jeff, Ron and their family.
I know they throw a big party every christmas but I asked for my private one since I will not be in this town on the 24th. They happily agreed. Ron took care of the dinner while Jeff prepared drinks and presents. We ate, drank, and laughed while exchanging pictures of our ancestors. For couple hours I got to enjoy being part of their wonderful family. Thanks Jeff and Ron!
Every year I found very hard to deal with the loneliness and sadness of being alone in this country. There are no work or classes to keep busy my brain, therefore I need to face the fact that my family is far away. Hence, the pictured happy family in the TV commercials becomes difficult to ignore.

However, I am a strong believer that being happy is a decision I make everyday. Thus, in this christmas time, I usually take some private time to acknowledge, embrace, and welcome my christmas loneliness. I open the door to the sadness and all the negative thoughts that want to come in. After all, they are a sign of my humanness . . .  I guess. Anyway, every year we greet each other and make some agreements. We agreed that my “real” family is in Mexico and I we have the option to celebrate with the wonderful new families I got in this country for the last five years. My loneliness is free to send friendly reminders about the sadness I suppose to feel and I will take care of the rest. We have been doing a pretty good team for the last few years.

Thanks to those reminders, I put honest efforts in enjoying the time I have with each person. The results are exciting. I get to have several small christmas parties everywhere. For instance, last November I took presents for my family in Mexico, I got to enjoy the faces of my nieces and nephew opening their presents and had several dinners with my sisters and parents. I also spent a entire day with my Mexican friends where we told each other how important we are in our lives. I am having christmas parties this week in South Dakota. Additionally, on the very christmas day, I am planing to visit the 10 and something mothers I have in California.
Ever since I took the decision of building my Holiday-happiness, I learned that people enjoy being cooperative and playing this game along with me. I have found my perfect way of  dealing with these season. At the end of this game, we all win. We all celebrate each other and enjoy having extended families where christmas loneliness is a very important guest. I can tell than in my journey I have found many other people who deal with the same issue.

Have Make Happy Holidays . . . until the next post.

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One Response to Is loneliness one of your guests this holiday season?

  1. Jason says:

    Carmen, it was very meeting you last night and it was a great evening! Oh by the way this is Jason. Hope to see you next time you are in town.

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